The King of Hearts

In the name of Allah, the ever gracious, the most merciful.

So, many things have been happening for the past 2 weeks. I turned 24 last Monday and went for an adventure for five days with my good friends, Grace and Yanie. But this post isn't about how the trip went instead, about my JPJ test which is going to be held this Friday.

Tipulah kalau cakap tak takut atau nervous.

Being 24 and all, I know that it's a little too late to learn how to drive but it is one of the most basic skills, I believe one should have. In all the commotion and mixed feelings, I realised how this feeling could easily overcome/ control your relationship with God. To tell you the truth, even in solah and in duás I never forgot to ask Allah to make easy my journey to pass the test. Sometimes I get super uptight about the test that my head revolves about clutch, gears and hand breaks even during solah.

reflect and you will see.

In life, especially when you are still in school, you will face countless exams and tests. It is normal, I guess, to be nervous and all (even though boys are more in control in this) and when you become nervous your head can only think about the exam, the questions that may come out and what happens if you fail. Then, only then, that your head can't focus on the other things (like taking care of yourself and the people around you). And the most important thing, you neglect your responsibility as a Muslim. Yes, one could say that he/she has performed his/her prayers, but did he/she really had a meaningful, fulfilling time meeting Allah?

I have been facing this problem lately, the inability to focus ever since I was informed the date of my test. Being the youngest and all, I felt under pressure because all my siblings passed on the first trial.

I really hoped that my fear does not overcome my devotion towards Allah. You know sometimes when we get too scared of something, that something became our main concern? Yes, I worry that my fear towards the test goes beyond my fear towards Allah's wrath, naúzhubillahimin zaalik.

Sometimes we don't notice these kind of things, but they happen, they exist. When the worldly things become our main priority, we place them in the place of a higher importance than our obedience towards Allah. Always remember that, everything has its place but Allah's place is always at the top and none other. Allah is our King. He is the King of Hearts. Being the creator of all and the most powerful, His place is and will always be on top. Believe it or not, Allah can change everything in split seconds and none can object Him when it is His will. Be alarmed that if we put other creations in His place, Allah's wrath is definitely going to be in its way.

I hope Allah will guide us when we are in such a place, and forgive us for that, Allahumma Amiin.

اللهم لا تجعل الدنيا أكبر همنا

"O Allah, do not make this world our biggest concern..."